Scary, isn’t it? The idea of spending so much time alone with your kids in a strange country.
Truth is, I love it, life is nicer, generally.
OK, so we’ve only been on the road for two weeks, we’re new at this, but we haven’t been treating this time as a holiday, we’ve started as we mean to go on, travelling slow, living our lives, not rushing around the sites and having a high-old-time.
Here we go with seven reasons I prefer travelling with kids to being at home with kids.
Seven Reasons I Love Travelling With Kids.
1. It’s easier to entertain them. All we have to do is step outside the hostel to experience something new, we can look at shops, people, buildings, vehicles and food outlets. Everything is new and different, everything brings about questions and conversations, nothing is boring.
2. We are living in the moment. Little things, the chores of normal life, become events in our day. Cutting nails, taking a shower, washing up. All these things have stopped being just another job to be rushed through and got over with. We have nothing to be rushing on to do. So a trip to the shower block is a good opportunity for a chat, I can sit outside while I talk to them in the shower cubicles, help them with shampoo and towels, get them back to the room and make sure they are warm and dry. It’s nice, it’s an event in the day and I can stop and think about how lucky I am to have these little toenails to cut.
3.Food is less of a focus. I’ve stopped stressing about feeding them, when they are hungry, they eat, so do I. I can treat them to a banana pancake or a pineapple pie if we pass a stall selling them. I don’t have to keep cupboards stocked or worry about meals being just-so. D (9) just had a vegetable samosa from a street stall and a marmite and tomato sandwich for lunch. He’s been snacking on fruit all morning. He’s eating just fine, without me having to worry. I’m eating less and losing weight, I no longer eat through boredom.
4. The kids are taking on more responsibility. I’m cursed with being a perfectionist, I like things done just-so at my house.
Here, in this lovely hostel, I’m far less up-tight. The kids are washing their own plates and glasses, helping me wash clothes and packing their own things away. It’s good for them, they’re really proud of themselves, and it’s less stress for me.
I’m not sure if I’m letting them do these things because I’m less stressed or I’m less stressed because they are doing more for themselves. Could be either.
5.We are truly doing things together. How often, at home, do the kids end up in one room and Mum in another? They watch TV while you cook dinner or play games while you’re online. That doesn’t happen now, we’re together the whole time, if they watch a movie, I have the luxury of watching it with them. We can read together, talk, play Uno, watch Star Trek. Always together, all three of us. I know exactly what’s going on in their world and in their heads, it’s good.
We only have one computer, so sometimes I just hand it over and watch them enjoy the technology while I do absolutely nothing. That’s a very rare thing in the real world.
6. They are learning so much more. They’ve had six years in Port Douglas. They’ve pulled every shred of learning out of that environment, from the beach, to the rainforest, to the reef. OK, that’s not true, liar-liar pants-on-fire, nobody could ever know everything, but they know all that they need to know.
Now they’re in a totally new environment. They’re seeing and experiencing new things every day. They’re figuring out how to do things, how to buy a train ticket from the high tech machine at the station, how to buy themselves a snack or a drink in a foreign currency from a street stall, how to follow maps and negotiate the world around them.
It’s lovely to watch their confidence grow, on the first day they were nervous as kittens, now they look like they own this area.
7. They are meeting new people. They’ve chatted with travellers old and young at the hostel, learning how to interact with all sorts of individuals. From the Indonesian and Chinese tourists who love to take photos of cute Western kids ( smile and wave boys, just smile and wave), to the lovely young girls who just enjoy talking to them.
On the streets we’ve met Muslims, Hindus and Christians, we’ve experienced kindness and indifference. Kindness is winning hands down at the moment.
They are learning to function in a fairly adult world, they need to show consideration to other hostel guests, keep the noise down, not run around, tidy their stuff away. I think it’s good for them. There is plenty of time to play, too, Kuala Lumpur has amazing places for them to run and climb and I have plenty of time to take the children to those places, I don’t have to rush home to mop the floor.
So, for now, it is good, very good. Travelling with my children is cheaper than being at home, it’s certainly better for the children and for us as a family. I’m just wondering why we didn’t do this sooner.
How long will it last before I’m screaming and tearing my hair out, wishing for my own space and home comforts? Don’t know. No idea. Stick around and find out.
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Beautiful post and I wholeheartedly agree. I travelled/lived abroad for six years before coming back to Oz to “settle down” and we now have a three-year-old son but have just started to fit more travel time into our lives – had a month in Europe recently – and it is definitely a more relaxed and enjoyable way to parent and my son learnt and grew so much. Now just figuring out some more extended trips for the future!
Alyson I love this list! I can’t wait for our adventure to start and we can kick back and enjoy spending quality time together rather than everyone dashing from work to school to after school activities.
Sarah
It really is true Sarah, the children have their moments, they drove me nuts yesterday afternoon, but once you focus more on them, their needs, it’s great, so rewarding. I slowly woke up, snuggled in a single bed with D this morning, ” you’re the best mum in the world, mum”. That wouldn’t happen if they had to rush off to school 🙂
i admit. i’m teary eyed looking at these photos. they bring me back to a place so very dear to our hearts- BackHome Hostel will always be so special to us. And your insights! I’m so proud of you! Beginnings are not easy. Our beginnings, in March 2011 when we hit New York and it was sooooooo hard, and many other little beginnings along the way have been really hard. I’m so proud and inspired by what you are learning. Go girl. I knew you could do it Alyson! Deep respect, Gabi
Thank you Gabi 🙂
Glad to see things are going so well. I’m sure it will continue. Amy and I appreciate having more time together too since we’ve been travelling. It makes such a difference.
Isn’t it funny how they take on so much more responsibility when traveling? I love that!
I think it’s because I let them Laurel. I’m too up-tight to let them have a go at home.
Ugh. Me too.
Alyson,
I really appreciate your blog, and this post gets me extra excited for our own big trip with our kids beginning next month. Perhaps our paths will cross…. I will be following you!
Lyndel
Thanks so much Lyndel, I’ll go check you out, see where your going! There are so many families travelling with children, I’m sure we’ll all run into each other eventually. Good luck!
Hi Alyson,
I just read your latest post, and I am sorry for your recent string of bad luck. This haze event is so awful… something has to change with that. Anyway, could you please let me know what Facebook group you mentioned of the traveling families? I would love to join that. you can email me directly at lyndel1374@gmail.com
Thanks so much,
Lyndel
Lyndel, just search families on the move on facebook. You have to have travel plans of over 6 months, within the next year and have children. A moderator will chat to you before approving you. See you there!
I love the photo of the kids making huts with what clothes you have.
I’m loving your journey so far, I check in each morning with my cuppa tea.
Glad you’re enjoying yourselves.
xox
Thanks Kym, they’ll find a way to play anywhere. Who needs toys?
I see some similarities with the fact that John had to take Will everywhere with him until he was 14 unless he was in school. It taught him to interact with lots of people in many different circumstances. Result – confident young man with good social skills. Retirement is giving me the chance to be with Will more, too. I believe giving kids the chance to interact with the world helps them to think outside the box better – mine does! They need that if they are to be successful in this rapidly changing life of ours.
Thanks Kate, I totally agree, a lot of kids in school only know how to get on with same age kids. The homeschooled kids don’t have those boundaries. I see it in young adults, particularly. A sweeping generalisation, I know, but it’s certainly a noticeable trend.
Yup!
Losing weight, less housework, more fun with the kids, and cheaper……sign me up! =)
I took a before photo on the day we left, at around 72KG. I’ll do a before and after post soon Suzi. I knew this would happen, it always does.
Alyson, isn’t it refreshing? We love to travel with the kids. While we are mainly based in Spain, we will be hitting the road for a flexible 4-6ish weeks next Tuesday. I love that you are eating less, perhaps that will work for me too. LOL We have adjusted just fine to the “living in the moment” mentality and think it is great. The kids are sponges and learn so much along the way. Looking forward to reading more.
Thanks Heidi, it is. I thought I had it all, having my kids home because they don’t go to school has been amazing. But this is way better!
Just discovered your blog and LOVE it! I’m so excited for you, my husband and I did a short (10 week) backpacking trip through SE Asia before we had kids and it was the best; we’re planning on doing something similar when they’re a bit older. Sorry if this is already on the site somewhere but have you got a route planned? Highly recommend the Perhentian islands before you leave Malaysia, picture perfect beach cabins, great snorkelling trips, good cheap food, generally good for a break if you need one!
Hi Hannah, so glad you’re here, I love your enthusiasm! No, no route, no plan, just lots of time and a world to explore ( on a tight budget). I’d love to do the Perhentians, they’re on my mental list. Hope you stay with us.
Sounds wonderful and inspirational! Love the photo with one of the boys on the laptop with a can of Tiger on the table. lol.
My beer Josh, if either of the kids touches my beer, they’re on the first plane back to their father. It’s expensive, I sip my one can very slowly!